Fatherly Advice: “You’re not coming back tomorrow”, by Nathan Douthit

A view from the side of the road on our way to Eilat in Mitzpe Ramon.  Not far from B7!

 When I was growing up, my family loved to travel. We were homeschooled, so the flexibility of our schedule (and the portability of our school) allowed us to leave for different places often. I loved these adventures, and I believe it was those early trips with my family and church that helped feed my interest in other cultures, and lead me on the path to this school. I can remember, on those trips, being torn about whether or not to spend my money on something, or whether or not to do some side activity that was being offered. My dad always said, “Just remember, we’re not coming back tomorrow.” That advice, along with much more from Dad, has always stuck with me. I guess it was kind of his way of saying carpe diem. It always encouraged me to take advantage of the opportunities I had before me.

The Red Sea at dusk

One of the many breathtaking views from Masada

So, my wife and I have been to Jerusalem, Galilee, Haifa, and Tel Aviv last semester; and a few of those spots multiple times. We have plans to go to England over Pesach (Passover), and took advantage of a long weekend for Purim to visit the Red Sea, Eilat and Masada. We had a fantastic time snorkeling, enjoying the beautiful weather, and relaxing in the laid back environment. I’ve put in a few of our favorite photos from the trip for your enjoyment. Since we already live on this side of the world, travel to Europe and Asia is significantly cheaper from here, and when we find ourselves debating a trip or activity, Dad’s advice rings in our ears.

Kate and me on Eilat's North Beach, with Aqaba, Jordan behind us

From the pier, where we went snorkeling.

            Which leaves me with just one more thing to say, addressed to the incoming first year class or anyone who finds themselves surrounded by opportunity. There are a variety of pressures and responsibilities that accompany medical education. There are loans to worry about, family members to Skype, and personal, mental, and spiritual health to preserve. Certainly, don’t neglect things. Remember however, that the proverbial day is fleeting, and you may not be coming back tomorrow. 

- blogger of the month, Nathan Douthit

Part 2: to the non-student spouse, by guest blogger Kate Douthit

After we got married when folks asked Nathan and me what our future plans were, we would respond, “ We are planning on going to medical school.” Upon getting accepted to medical schools we would say, “ We got accepted to….” Almost always people would respond in a surprised tone, “You’re BOTH going to medical school?” Well, we aren’t both students in medical school (we’ll let the Boricks give their wisdom on that!), but since we began, that phrase has become more and more real. Indeed, WEare going to medical school. Besides the fact that we have taken part in this one flesh union, we are both affected by Nathan’s attendance to MSIH. While I do not have the responsibilities of completing homework, studying for exams, and going to class every day, I still bear the weight that comes with those responsibilities. Oftentimes, after a long day apart from my husband, I don’t want to let him study. Many a morning, I am tempted to coerce Nathan into missing class. Upon his arrival home the first thing I want to do is relieve myself of all the words I have stored up. However, I realize, being his partner, I can be his biggest help or his biggest hindrance to doing well in the things he has been called to do.

            As his wife and helpmate, it is my desire to encourage Nathan to be diligent in what he does. Nathan understands that he is my husband first, and a medical student second. I know that I don’t have to question whether or not he loves me when he expresses to me that he needs time to study. His being purposeful to establish his love was a big help to me in allowing him the time he needs to be a good student as well. Laying this foundation gave me much comfort as we entered into this unfamiliar season. I am thankful for the confidence of knowing he is always on my team.

            We also found it helpful, in a practical sense, to have a schedule. Being married doesn’t come naturally and it requires intentionality, whether a student or not. Being a student just adds to the need to mindfully plan time with one another so as to not let studying take over our lives. (I’ll take this time to say that if you are one who struggles more with the temptation to skip studying, than to let it take you over, than perhaps a schedule would be helpful for you too, just in a different way!) We have found that the best schedule for us is a couple hours of studying when Nathan gets home (whether an exam is coming up or not), and by suppertime books are put away and the evening is ours to spend enjoying time together or fellowshipping with others in our home. Nathan is also good at using breaks during the day as chances to get some studying done (another reminder of his love J). Fridays are his days off: no studying. It’s helpful, when I am tempted to be frustrated by his studying throughout the week, to look forward to a day set aside for just us!

            As for my days, no two really look the same. The first of the week, another wife and I make our weekly grocery trip (this is a day all by itself!). Mid week is usually when I run our errands (paying bills, picking up anything we may need, etc.) In the mornings, I try to study Hebrew and practice piano (this is a recent endeavor!) When we first arrived my days were occupied taking an Ulpan with another wife and trying to get a little Hebrew under my belt (still trying!). Now that it’s over, I try to make it a point to visit, call, or have someone over a few times a week. This is a great way to build and nurture relationships (making it feel more like home) and also another way for me to use “my words” so that I’m not spewing thousands all over Nathan as he walks through the door!  Other spouses and friends of mine have found opportunities to volunteer in the community. There are plenty of ways to be involved here, it just may take a little effort! It’s been a learning experience for sure, one that continues constantly, but I am thankful for the way it has grown our relationship and that Be’er Sheva is becoming our home more and more each day.

            So to you non-student spouses who are concerned about how your time here will be spent and how you will wander your way through this uncertain territory, know that there are many ways to make a life here in the desert. It is a challenge that requires intentionality, however, take comfort in knowing you’re not the first and only ones to experience this journey, and you’re not alone. Take the losses in stride and rejoice with your spouse in the victories you share!  - guest blogger Kate Douthit

A very blog-able day, by Sarah Humphreys

I am thrilled to be February blogger of the month, as today was a very blog-able day.  Since moving here, I’ve found myself saying yes to things I would normally say no to. Do you feel like getting up at the crack of dawn to run a race? Of course not. Do you feel like getting up at the crack of dawn to run the lowest race on earth? Sign me up! And so, this morning, about 10 classmates and I awoke at the wee hour of 4:30am to drive to the Dead Sea to run the Ein Gedi Dead Sea half marathon (or for the less bipedaly inclined, myself included, a 10K).

As we rolled out of Beer Sheva in the dark, four friends and I sandwiched into our clownishly petite Nissan Micra rental, we felt like deviant children sneaking out of the city we love to hate, as if it were a stern and disapproving parent. As we drove up past Omer, and eventually down through the Wadi as the sun crept slowly up behind burnt red mountain plateaus, we munched on nuts and banana chips and talked about the improbability of the Israelites wandering here for 40 years, in terrain so inhospitable to human life.

The race itself  (my first ever) was pleasant and pretty uneventful. I don’t think I can say the same for the half-marathoners as the sun was surprisingly unforgiving at 10am when they were finishing up. After the race we walked (some of us hobbled) to the Ein Gedi spa where we took a tractor ride to the Dead Sea for some mud, sun and sea bathing.

In reflecting upon days, it often holds true that the sweetest and most meaningful parts are the spaces in between, or the moments of unfolding after the action and excitement have peaked.  As we drove back to Beer Sheva, tracing the Green Line through Bedouin and Israeli villages, we found ourselves winding through miles of grass, trees and hills spotted here and there with flocks of sheep grazing, interspersed with an odd camel or two. We dubbed this secret area ‘Israel’s Ireland’, as the trees and greenery were so shocking and so welcome to our eyes now so accustomed to the stony and dusty Negev.

As we went in search of an area supposedly rich in February wildflowers, Joey and Jamie told us the story of how Abraham and Sarah settled in Beer Sheva and the sad story of when they banished Hagar because of Sarah’s jealousy over her ability to bear Abraham’s child. Jamie said it is the first instance where God shows compassion in the Bible. At some point I made a bad joke about how the problem with Beer Sheva is that they replaced the 7 wells with 7 malls (Beer Sheva literally means seven wells, and is now known as the mall capital of Israel).

When we finally did roll back into town, the temperature was ten degrees cooler, and I remember thinking, as I watched the boys next door kick a soccer ball around, and heard the rooster across the street crow, and saw the plump lemons fermenting on the ground beneath the tree, that sometimes it just takes a day away to allow you to have compassion for where you are.  - February blogger of the month, Sarah Humphreys

Being Married in MSIH (Part 1: The Student's View) by Nathan Douthit

As I sit here and ponder what to write, I am reminded of all the questions I had when I was preparing for starting at MSIH. You know, crucial things, like, “Will there be Dr. Pepper?” (Sadly no, except for on rare occasions.) “Will there be other people from the south?” (Again, mostly no, except for a classmate from Texas, which is basically its own country anyway.) “Will the language come naturally?” (Absolutely not.) But the most important question I had was, “Will my wife be okay?”

Now let me preface this with a comment, there are a variety of marriage situations that students come to MSIH with. Some are married with their spouse back in the States. Some have a spouse who can do work from a remote location, like Israel. Some are able to immigrate, and their spouses can work or study in Israel. Some, like my aforementioned Texan friend, have four children whom they homeschool, and stay plenty busy. In some marriages, both spouses are students! My wife, Kate, and I, are in none of the above situations.

We were married for 366 days when we left for Israel, being basically newlyweds, leaving her Stateside wasn’t an option (since I’ve been here I have been thankful every day for that decision. Few other classmates have even heard of chicken and dumplings). Also, her degree is in Human Development and Family Studies, which I am sure has some viable vocational opportunities from a remote location, but she did not have such a vocation. We are not really interested in becoming Israeli citizens and have no children, so we weren’t really sure what we were getting ourselves (but more specifically, her) into. However, it has truly been a great experience for both of us! I want to briefly detail what it is like for the student in the marriage, and my lovely wife has promised to submit a post later sharing what it’s like for the non-student spouse.

The bad news first, and it is accompanied by a newsflash for the incoming students. Medical school is difficult. It requires substantially greater amounts of time devoted to the academic pursuits than did my bachelor’s degree. The first and most important thing I learned as a married student is that my life had to be more structured. We usually spend every day in class from around 8-3 or 8-5. On top of that, in order to succeed many additional hours are required. Medical school is a little like one of the many microbes we learn about. The conditions in Be’er Sheva are perfect for that little nasty academic to proliferate and completely overgrow your life. Since my wife and I decided that our marriage is more important than my education, I had to learn to structure my life. I want to set aside plenty of time every day to take care of her, help her, and hang out with her, since she’s my favorite person. That means, for me, almost every spare moment is spent studying. During the mid-class 15 minute breaks and the breaks between classes, I strive to remain in my desk, trying to knock out as much studying as I can. During lunch, I finish in 20 minutes so I can spend the next 40 in the library. I do all this so that by the time dinner comes around, I can put my books away for the evening, and enjoy my time with my bride. Also, Friday is a no study day for me, and Kate and I spend the whole day together. It is such a pleasure and much needed rest!

Now the good news. I live with my best friend. She is so helpful to me, taking care of so many different things so that we can be together. I’ll let her tell you more about her activities when her blog post comes, but suffice it to say she pays our bills, buys our groceries, does our laundry, cooks our food and does so much more. Remember, these mundane tasks are no small feat in a new country! I have no hesitation in saying I am one spoiled student. Of course I help with those things when I am home and they need to be done, but she is usually way ahead of me. I also am the envy of classmates when I bring my home-cooked lunches to class with me. We love to entertain, so my wife is good to share the wealth by inviting over other classmates to eat dinners with us. I would not trade being married to her for anything in the world.

So, in a nutshell, this post is directed to the nervous married student, who is bringing his or her spouse along and not sure what they will do. Don’t worry, as a student, with a little discipline, you’ll be fine. Your spouse will be fine as well, but I won’t spoil Kate’s post. Look forward to it in the days to come!  - blogger of the month, Nathan Douthit

Small Victories, or How I Learned to Stop Trivializing and Love the Travail, by Seth Morrison

This past week was a week of small victories. These undersized accomplishments demand no recording in the great history books of noble deeds, and I myself will probably forget about them entirely within a single trip around the sun. In other words, it was an average week. But, I have been learning over the past several years and up to now not to trivialize these small victories. One must grow to love the ongoing travail of life that together they comprise.

If you care to know what these victories were, read on from here. If not, skip to the paragraph beginning with, “As you can see…”

During the week I…

Was pleased that I owned a wool coat for a stretch of some wet, chilly weather in Beer Sheva,

Answered a question about the wet, chilly weather in Hebrew to a neighbor who asked me as he was leaving his apartment,

Saw a different neighbor, Meir, in the Soroka Hospital cafeteria during lunch and understood (mostly) what he was telling me in Hebrew about visiting his elderly mother in the hospital,

Found out that I escaped the first semester of medical school without failing any exams,

Cooked a three-course dinner for a group of six, the most people I have ever prepared a dinner for by my own efforts,

Improved my tiny apartment room by installing several hooks in various places to increase its storage capacity, and bought a desk lamp to prevent premature eye damage from late nights studying with insufficient light,

Finally got working cell phone service again after the first company I used cancelled my account with them, for no apparent reason, back in December, and called family members in America for no extra charge,

Received a compliment on work done on a scientific literature review project that I thought would surely be disappointing, at best, to the professor,

Learned a bit about childhood development at clinical observations in a pediatric specialist’s office,

And, I finally came to understand the overall treatment regimen for patients infected with tuberculosis—a subject that had perplexed me—thanks to a stirring lecture by Dr. Alkan.

As you can see, I won’t be winning prizes, grants, medals, or any other accolades for my doings in the week of January 27, 2013. but, the beauty of that lies in the fact that I still thought it was a good week despite its ordinariness and not receiving any exterior recognitions for it.

I think it is all too easy for a medical student to go down the well-trodden path that many people of letters end up on. They come into their education like children—idealistic, wide-eyed, empty vessels ready to be filled—and many leave like Faust—devoid of the purpose and ideals with which they started, floating on the breeze toward they know not what. They leave laden with knowledge they have not a clue how to most meaningfully employ toward good ends.

Here is what Faust said after he’d finished his course of study:

[Night: in a narrow high-arched gothic study

Faust, sitting uneasy at his desk.]

Faust:  Have now, alas! quite studied through

Philosophy and Medicine,

And Law, and ah! Theology, too,

With hot desire the truth to win!

And here, at last, I stand, poor fool!

As wise as when I entered school;

Am called Magister, Doctor, indeed—

Ten livelong years cease not to lead

Backward and forward, to and fro,

My scholars by the nose—and lo!

Just nothing, I see, is the sum of our learning,

To the very core of my heart 'tis burning…

What then? all pleasure is fled forever;

To know one thing I vainly endeavor…

And then, too, nor goods nor gold have I,

Nor fame nor worldly dignity—

A condition no dog could longer live in!

And so to magic my soul I've given,

If, haply, by spirits' mouth and might,

Some mysteries may not be brought to light;

That I may know what the world contains

In its innermost heart and finer veins,

            (from Faust, A Tragedy, by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, 1808)

Perhaps I have no authority to speak of such things, as I am yet at the incoming end of the educative transaction, but then again perhaps thinking about them now will deflect me from this regrettable path. It helps me to remember the words of Dr. Viktor Frankl, who wrote, “Man does not simply exist, but always decides what his existence will be, what he will become in the next moment.” So, my prayer for the class of 2016 is that we would not get lost in the directionless mire of the daily grind, that we will learn to appreciate and act on the insights that even the most mundane of weeks can bring, and that we will not succumb to the Faustian temptation of narcissism by the time we’ve reached the home stretch. Amen. - blogger of the month, Seth Morrison